I spend my time..
doing endless amounts of sums..
to prepare myself..
for the final test of 24 or so miserable questions..
on how to process numbers through
numerical techniques..
which make up a third of a piece of paper
which is of so much worth to me..
I spend my time..
going through endless amounts of text..
to prepare myself..
for 3 essays...
1 DRQ
1 Case Study
1 MCQ
on why and how human greed creates...
this idea of an organised economy...
I study human impulses..
which make up a third of a piece of paper..
which is of so much worth to me
I spend my time
going through six pieces of literature.
to do 8 essays..
on the imaginations of a few old geezers...
most of which have pretty screwed up lives.
which make up a third of a piece of paper..
which os of so much worth to me..
now how on earth can I move beyond such absolute..
stupidity of this world?..
one word:transcendence......
oh wait...
I still have yet to complete Super Mario RPG(classic game by the way..)
guess transcendence will have to wait...=p
Its coming..
doesn't matter whether you are ready..
it's ready..
it's the final stretch..
and I haven't exactly done much..
I did pretty much most of the tys..
then I decide to flip..
through the pages of Cj's papers..
poof..
I'm still like what???
lol..
yea..
looks pretty screwed from this side
actually it looks pretty much screwed everywhere..
I haven't done serious stuff for my other subjects..
my head is still like..
what???
lol..
this is so fucked up..
its like one big fireball..
racing faster and faster towards me..
but I'm still clinging on to hope..
and whoever you are..
I hope you are clinging on to it too..
because that's the only thing..
I'm holding on to right now..
before I trip into nothingness.
all in the valley of death,
rode the six hundred...
and because only idiots can be heroes...=D
I have earned..
a new respect for muggers..
of which I am not proud of..
but have to admit..
working....for hours is hard..
I admit that...
it's physically impossible...for me..
to study that long..
I just tried that yesterday..
and it didn't work..
it's like trying to shove a bowling ball into a golf hole..
seriously...my eyes have blurred out..
my mind is blank...
everything makes as much sense
as my meaning to live...
but I guess I just have to do what I can...
and hope it all works out in the end..
hope...
there's a word...
I think the only thing to live off itself..
hope is so meaningless..
yet so meaningful..
empty yet full..
but its how much you believe in that hope.
and no matter where you are..
as long as you have hope..
you can go on..
mine's kind of waning now..
and I swore I reposted this entry longer..
but that could just be a halluncination too right?...
I so wish..
I could plunge a knife straight into the face.
of the nearest happy thing I see...
on a lighter note..
I learnt how to use a zip..
thank you Yong Xin.
Release yourself